KASARACHI
Kasarachi - Episode 8
(Tell it to God)
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
Just when I thought Mama had gone to bed for the night since I didn't hear her voice after the goodnight farewell.
I heard footsteps behind me and then I saw her hastily walking to stand in front of me with our small flashlight in her left hands
She started pointing the flashlight at the direction of the whisper whilst at the same time angrily blurted out with a raised voice
"Who is that night owl at this time of the night calling out my daughter's name...? Eh..? Come here and show me your face mr man if you have the liver"
Ekene who called out to me ran away immediately he heard Mama's voice which made matters even worse.
Mama upon hearing the running footsteps turned to look at me angrily
" Kasarachi is this how wayward you've now become...? I didn't even turn my back properly...you are already scheduling meetings with your lover outside my house. What exactly is your problem eh this girl..? Have you finally gone uncontrollable..?"
Chai! This guy wants to put me into trouble this night. I thought he had broken up with me so what's all this one...?
How do I even explain this kind of a thing to Mama for her to believe that I have no hand in Ekene coming here this late.
"I didn't invite him oh Mama. I was eating when I heard someone whisper my name and it turns out to be Ekene. I swear I didn't tell him to come here this night" I said in a bid to convince mama of my innocence
Mama looked at me for a while and exhaled heavily. She must have seen that I wasn't lying to her that's why she went quiet and gently sat down on the bench I was sitting
She patted the empty space beside her and told me to sit that she wants to talk to me. And as mama instructed, I sat down closely beside her on the bench.
I figured that it was going to be a long lecture with her tonight and honestly I wasn't prepared for it at all. Look what Ekene has caused now. I thought sighing
"Mama please not tonight. We can talk tomorrow morning before I leave for the farm" I said in order to avoid tonight's talk but she still began her talk regardless
" Kasaramma I am your mother and I cannot lie to you or lead you astray. I understand that at your age...you are already having the need to get warmth and loved by these young boys" Mama said which got me chuckling a little
"...I'm not joking here Kasarachi. See, when I was your age I had boys and men flocking around me...you're a beautiful girl so I'm not surprised that you are experiencing it too. I just want you to be careful not to spoil your future for a few minutes of pleasure"
I chuckled again because I wanted to annoy Mama and I succeeded in doing just that, as she looked at me wondering what was funny that's making me chuckle constantly
"Mama so you know that early involvement with boys and men is going to spoil my future...yet you were willing to oblige uncle's selfish request to marry me out to Ekene's brother. Or was it not the same you that said I should marry Nonso..?" I asked looking at her whilst smiling mischievously
Mama went quiet probably trying to come up with a good answer to my question. She sighed and gave a response after seeing that I wasn't going to let it slide without a reply
" I know it was very wrong of me but the truth is that I wasn't totally in agreement with everything. Your uncle and kinsmen threatened to take our only surviving farmland if I deny my approval as your mother" Mama said and I bursted into laughter as I reasoned the whole thing
I soon stopped laughing and looked at mama since I feel so displeased by what she said earlier. So I'm now a sacrificial lamb...?
"So to save our farmland I had to be the sacrificial lamb...is that it mama...?" I asked in a sarcastic voice laced with anger
I don't even know if it makes sense to be angry with her since she was thinking of the family's welfare.
I mean imagine if the farmland was taken away, what would then become our fate and source of survival...? So I perfectly understand the points she tried to make
" That's not reason enough I know but that isn't even the main reason I accepted to partner with your uncle. Kasarachi I mainly accepted the marriage request because I know Nonso to be a responsible young man with the resources and prospects to give you a better future. These village men especially old Mazi Kalu have absolutely nothing to offer you in this village" Mama said and I began to see reasons with her
I sighed deeply and then politely told her that I understand her fears but I still don't want to get married until I'm above eighteen years old at least.
"I don't have a problem with your decision Kasarachi. Even if you want to stay till you are twenty-five years before marriage...my daughter I do not mind at all. The main problem here is your father's people. And the fact that your suitors and the pressure from them will keep increasing with each day as you grow older makes it even worse" Mama said to me solemnly.
I could tell that she was feeling extremely worried for me and I won't lie that I wasn't worried for myself as well, because I was. I decided to twist the question to my favour
"I understand you mama and at this point I don't even have much to say. Maybe you are right that Nonso might be my pathway to a better future...but have you thought of the other side of the coin...?" I asked her and from the confusion on Mama's face, I could tell that she didn't really understand the parable I placed at the end.
I was right after her being confused because mama hissed loudly as she told me
"Kasarachi you know I stopped school in my junior secondary three...so please speak in plain language so that I can easily understand. Which one is the other side of a coin...? What does that one even mean...?"
I laughed first at her funny way of complaining before I stopped and then continued explaining to her understanding
"Mama I mean what if after marriage Nonso turns out to be a future destroyer...? Or haven't you heard of girls whose husbands marry and take them to obodo oyibo and he turns out to be their worst nightmare...?"
My thought provoking question got mama thinking deeply and I'm glad that I hit a nerve in her. Everyone keeps talking about the good future marriage can offer me but what if it is the other way around...?
"I never bothered to think of the negative side until now you mentioned it Kasarachi. Now I'm scared of allowing my daughter to get married to a man that leaves faraway. At least if you marry here in this village...I can always keep my eyes on you so that nobod.."
I had to cut Mama short as I wasn't liking the direction the conversation was leading to. Must mama's mind always be limited to marriage...? Me I'm tired of explaining things to her oh so I yawned feigning sleepy
"I need to go to bed mama. You are already boring me with these constant marriage talks. I'm tired of trying to make you understand that I want more out of life and I don't want it to revolve around marriage alone. I want to be a woman of substance and not a girl whose only poverty alleviation scheme is to get tossed to a man like a piece of property!" I said gently and stopped for a while to exhale before continuing with my words
" I'm aware that right now I don't have much choices. So I suppose it is pointless even trying to convince you to allow me breathe fresh air with all these talks. Let me make this clear mama that I am not marrying Nonso, Ekene, Mazi Kalu, or any other man until I'm eighteen and above! Except maybe you want to lose your first daughter. Goodnight!" I said conclusively and got up ready to walk inside
Mama heaved and seeing my determined face, she smiled and told me to sit again which I did out of respect for her
"I love your confidence and firmness Kasarachi. I once had big dreams like you but with the restrictions surrounding women I had to get married to your father at an early age. I wouldn't want that for my daughter either but my hands are tied"
I wanted to say something when mama shook her head indicating that I should allow her finish speaking first
"I support your decision and I am ready to stand by you. Kasarachi there's something that I'm going to suggest that you do. And if you accept to do it..then trust me when I say that you will successfully escape all of this marriage palava" Mama said looking at me with a serious face without batting an eyelid
My ears stood at attention not until she asked me a question which instilled fear inside of me on what the suggestion would be that requires toughness of heart
"But you will need to be tough at heart to take such a huge step forward. So I'm going to ask you Kasaramma...are you ready to fight for the kind of life you desire...?" Mama asked still staring intently at me
I reluctantly answered a yes and nodded vigorously to show her that I was serious too even though I was beginning to get scared. So I mentally prepared my heart for anything that will follow afterwards.
God! Absolutely nothing prepared me what the suggestion mama had to tell me entails. And like she had warned me earlier, the suggestion is truly not for the faint hearted.
It got me wondering if I am truly strong enough to take the initiative or I should simply discard it and make do with my life.
Infact all the toughness I thought I had gathered in my heart before this discussion suddenly disappeared and trepidation filled me, such that I looked at mama wondering if she is the one talking or it's someone else.
I sat there in silence after listening to Mama talk and I was torn between accepting and rejecting what she is suggesting to me.
(Do not take credit or Plagiarize AMAH'S HEART stories)
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